I have been doing a lot of research and writing, the results of which I post on my blog Please Listen. Until some scientific group decides they need to do research into the visual phenomena I am experiencing, I have gone about as far as I can go in understanding what is happening to me. I am still seeing a psychologist and he believes I have in fact become sensitized to light in the violet and near ultraviolet spectrum.
That is the same conclusion the neural ophthalmologist came to and he attributes it to mild ischemia in my brain stem from the procedure I had done to repair my trigeminial neuralgia. Both see no reason to pursue the experiences I am having as a result of the condition. The ophthalmologist does not accept what I see is external to my eyes and sees no need to pursue it further as there is no apparent health problem associated with the phenomena. If I did not have a pacemaker he would conduct an MRI but that option is off the table.The psychologist believes my eyes are responding to external stimuli but is concerned that my interpretations border on delusional though I show no other signs of delusional behavior.
I am scaling back my psychological sessions on his advice primarily for the same reasons I have no more scheduled eye exams, there is no danger to my health or the health of others.
As a result I decided to take a shot at hypnotic regression and suggestion. I picked one of the best in the field in my area and underwent a two hour session.
One of the things we learned about half way through was the light phenomena I am experiencing requires total darkness or it interferes with the process to the point hypnosis is not possible. I simply could not reach the state of mind needed in order to progress.
Once we covered my eyes, we started making progress. I did not know that you are consciously aware of your hypnotic state unless unless the hypnotist tells you to forget. I thought I was fully alert until the session ended and I tried to sit up rather abruptly. I have never been as disoriented as I was at that moment at any other time in my life. That includes coming out of sedation after surgery. After surgery you fade in and out but your lucid moments are obvious. That is not true coming out of hypnosis. Had it not been for the ending part I would never have realized I was in a hypnotic state.
I did not uncover anything that was of any significant value in my ongoing research, but it may have value later. I did discover a facet of my personality that I was not aware of that was placing too many expectations on people in general and I believe I am a better person now because of my session with a hypnotherapist.
Since my medical insurance does not cover hypnotherapy it is something I have to pursue carefully. If I had the discretionary funds I would definitely undergo more sessions. Under the circumstances, it will be awhile before I have another session. I have a lot of research to do and a lot of resources to look at along with writing down my thoughts and results. I'll wait until I find myself trapped in a corner if I ever do find myself trapped in a corner. There certainly is no danger of that currently.
My awareness of indigo light has reached a plateau for now and I have no new information in that regard. I continue to to have insights on any number of topics which accounts for the research and the writing. Any new events I will post to the blog.
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